Wednesday, July 05, 2006

NO MORE WOODY

BIRD: We've had complaints.

BUFFALO: Wassat?

BIRD: That there's too much sex on our flog.

BUFFALO: No way!

BIRD: Apparently, your woody just isn't doing it for the ladies. So it's time for Plan B.

BUFFALO: Plan B... OK. Uh, what is Plan B?

BIRD: We gotta show our feminine, touchy-feelie sides.

BUFFALO: Wot, like dress up in skirts and stuff?

BIRD: Oh, man. Think outside the box. Something that isn't about minxes and horns.

BUFFALO: You mean like violence or sumthin'?

BIRD: Why do I bother?

BUFFALO: I could tell you about the roadkill I tossed on the barbie for Independence Day. Charcoaled Groundhog. I tell ya, Birdy, ain't nothin' like it. Slap some peppers on and potato fritters. Vunder-bar!

BIRD: Hey, what about the multiple amputation sketch? That oughtta do it.

BUFFALO: Wot, the one with the flying testicles? I don't think so.

BIRD: The Christmas Santa sketch?

BUFFALO: The guy's just had a hysterectomy, dammit!

BIRD: Jeez, guess we better face it - we've been typecast.

BUFFALO: Hey, don't feel bad about it dude, I still love you.

BIRD: I love you, too, dude.

BUFFALO: We've got each other, right? Wot more do we need?

BIRD: You're a true friend, dude. I'll never forget you.

BUFFALO: Welling up over here, Birdy!

BIRD: Got the old waterworks working overtime here too, dude.

BUFFALO: You mean more to me than I can say, man. You know that.

BIRD: No, Buff, stop it. I can't...

BUFFALO: If anything happened to you, I don't know what I'd do.

(SOUNDS OF WAILING BIRD THROUGH SKY PEE)

BUFFALO: Dude?

BIRD: Write... the... cheque,... Momma. Omigod!

BUFFALO: Arf...

1 comment:

Splendor G. Mainwaring said...

Jesus H. Christ... get a room, you two.