Monday, March 28, 2011


BUFFALO: Any buddy home?

BIRD: Well, actually there is.

BUFFALO: Where ya bin?

BIRD: Out and about, like. Anyway, thing is, dude, we've been a bit remiss.

BUFFALO: Sorry bout dat. Blame it on da hooring.

BIRD: The hiring?

BUFFALO: Nicht, meine Pickle Schapper. Hooring. Yesterday. Today. Tomorra. Forever.

BIRD: Insatiable. Incredible. Isn't it ever enuff?

BUFFALO: Nope. Tank's still empty. More, und more und more again, ja? And what about you, dude? Ain't seen ya around since December.

BIRD: I've had issues.

BUFFALO: What kinda issues? Why didn't you Skype, e-mail, phone even?! I've been missin' ya.

BIRD: Missed you too, buddy. But I needed to get away, to find myself again.

BUFFALO: Best not to look for yourself, dude. There's only a shadow there, or a shadow of a shadow, or a little dark blob with a knob, so to speak.

BIRD: Well, I found a lot more than that. I found F sharp 9 for starters.

BUFFALO: What dafukk are you on about now, Birdman?

BIRD: It's a chord. It's great. I've been playing gee-tah again.

BUFFALO: Nice one.

BIRD: I sing whenever the spirit moves me, any time of day or night.

BUFFALO: Rock and roll!

BIRD: When I'm in the song, I'm in another world. It's a different me, ascending, descending, on the puff of a melodic wave, floating in aural delight on the musical ocean deep.

BUFFALO: Cripes! Sounds like an out of body experience. Have you been sniffing the curry powder agin?

BIRD: Dude, it's beautiful. It's just me, the music, the shapes and curves and shimmering surfaces.


BIRD: I tell you, I saw my true blob last night, with his knob, and his knob was radiant, tall and true.

BUFFALO: You darty auld bird.

BIRD: And I said to him... knob, lay thee down to slumber. And the knob of my true blob lay down and slumbered. And then I said... knob, beware of blobs bearing false knobs.

BUFFALO: Deep, dude, deep.

BIRD: Be true to your blob and he shall be trueth to you, oh true knob. Soon, you and I shall witness rebirth. Soon, the angels shall fall, the kettle shall boil, and we shall sip tea aplenty perched high on the stars. Just one step and we shall be free. Free! No more blobs. No more knobs.

BUFFALO: No more blobs! No more knobs!

BIRD: No more blobs! No more knobs!

BUFFALO: Blobs and knobs, out, out, out!

BIRD: Blobs and knobs, out, out, out!

BUFFALO: Blobs knobbed!

BIRD: Blobs knobbed!

BUFFALO: Out, out, out!

BIRD: Out, out, out!

BUFFALO: You did it, dude. You banished the blob with a knob. Maxi mummy respect O!

BIRD: Thanks, dude.

BUFFALO: Better go sort me own blobby knob out now. Blobby knob, come out, come out, wherever ya are?

BIRD: Film at eleven.

BUFFALO: Arf, arf!