BIRD: Wot the Freddy, dude? Wot ya done?!
BUFFALO: Nuffink much. Just shaved me gulliver, like.
BIRD: Yeah, but why?
BUFFALO: Solidarity with Britney, like.
BIRD: Eh?
BUFFALO: She's going through a tough time. She needs to know that I'm there for her.
BIRD: Dude, you look like a victim of a failed lobotomy.
BUFFALO: Dude, it's not how I feel, it's how Britney feels, and I know that my action has made her feel oh SO much better.
BIRD: And if she shaved her nipples off?
BUFFALO: Well, then I'd...
BIRD: And her Shepherd's Bush?
BUFFALO: Well, I'd... I'll do whatever it takes to heal that sweet misunderstood angel. The world's a wikkid place, dude. Britney's a little ray of sunshine glimmering in the fires of Hades.
BIRD: She's a big slapper with the intellectual capacity and sensibilities of a frozen pea.
BUFFALO: If this is a Britney versus Paris thang, don't go there, dude. The wound's still a-hurtin', if ya get m'drift.
BIRD: Dude, I thought you had the hots for Helen Mirren! Not some juvenile mutant on the road to McDummyanddummerville.
BUFFALO: (strokes photo) It's OK, Britters, he don't mean nothing by it. He's jealous. That's all. Note that I ain't demanding an apology from ya for those most hurtful of remarks of yours.
BIRD: Buffters, I'm outta here. Just one thing. If you decide to shave your Freddy, don't post a photo here, OK?
BUFFALO: As if! Don't worry, Britters, all this is temporary. When they realise the error of their ways, they'll BEG for your forgiveness and then you'll be right back at the top where you belong. So there, Birdman. Oo er, I suddenly feel kinda whoopy-loopy. Now where's my trank?
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