Monday, July 10, 2006

WORLD CUP WOES

BUFFALO: I see Italy won the soccer then.

BIRD: Football, Buff. Footie.

BUFFALO: Yeah, whatever. Pretty neat headbutt by that guy Zidane.

BIRD: Couldn’t have done it to a nicer guy.

BUFFALO: Hey, I thought you told me France were gonna win.

BIRD: Dude, I told you ENGLAND were gonna win. And they might’ve if that wazzock Rooney hadn’t got himself sent off.

BUFFALO: That shootout at the end, that was kinda exciting.

BIRD: There’s no justice in this world. Bunch of cheats. Rolling around on the ground in agony after a little tap on the ankle.

BUFFALO: Fookin’ lightweights. So how’d the escort service go last night?

BIRD: Omigod. Nearly got a Freddy in my molars. Lipstick smeared all over me mug. I tell ya, Buff, I gotta get another job. Some of these cross-dressers can’t take no for an answer.

BUFFALO: Still, good research for the book, right?

BIRD: It’s a jungle out there, Buff. Nowadays, a straight guy can’t make an honest living slipping into a skirt and black stockings.

BUFFALO: Aw, come on, you like it, really. You lap up the attention.

BIRD: The thrill has gone, dude. I’m hanging up my Wonderbra and panties and heading for the building site. You know where you are with bricks.

BUFFALO: Film at eleven.

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