Monday, July 16, 2007

PROPINQUITY BLOWOUT

BIRD: Come again, Buff?


BUFFALO: It's called the propinquity effect. The tendency for people to form friendships or romantic relationships with those whom they encounter often, in their family or neighborhood, whatever.


BIRD: Dude, you were in that cinema for less than an hour before you made a move on what's her name, Desiree?


BUFFALO: Point of order, dude. She made a move on me. There's no way I would willingly miss James Mason in 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea as part of a Disney double bill with Mary Poppins and you know that!


BIRD: And then you were asked to leave.


BUFFALO: We were going anyway. They make the seats so goddamn narrow and lumpy these days. Wot's an amorous bison to do?


BIRD: Er, watch the film, like?


BUFFALO: I was vulnerable, K? Mason plays Nemo with such feeling. Gets me in the avuncular every time. Besides, the backseat of the car's way more comfy, innit.


BIRD: Thank gawd you've got tinted windows, like.


BUFFALO: Worth every cent. And to think if you hadn't suggested it...


BIRD: Never mind that. I'm still interested in this propinquity angle. You said its about encountering often.


BUFFALO: Oh, I've seen Desiree many times before, in my dreams, like.


BIRD: Oh, and that counts, does it?


BUFFALO: Does to me. And I've seen someone remarkably like her down the Launderette too. And on my corridor. And in the parking lot. And down by the lake. Need I go on?


BIRD: It's not obligatory. I guess as long as you're happy...


BUFFALO: Dude, I'm deleterious. She's got it all going on, dude, believe me. In buckets and spades. Yes, sirree.


BIRD: That's incredible, I've never known you like this before after such a grubby encounter.


BUFFALO: Blame it on the Vindaloo after. It let off so many endorphins, I feel like a King Bee with his finger on the nectar, like.


BIRD: Blimey! Be careful, dude. She might be gone with the night, like.


BUFFALO: Propinquity, dude. U = universe, A = set A, B = set B, and S = similarity.


BIRD: Eh? You lost me past the post office.


BUFFALO: The more exposure a stimulus gets, the more likeable it becomes. And we were both highly exposed last nite, if ya get me drift.


BIRD: Let's hope you're right, dude, cos a fool and his derisories are easily parted.


BUFFALO: Nothing "propinques" like propinquity. - Walter Mondale, 1976.


BIRD: Yes, but All Things Must Pass. George Harrison, 1970.


BUFFALO: Possibly, but Imagine, John Lennon, 1971.


BIRD: But it could be a case of Flowers In the Dirt, Paul McCartney, 1989.


BUFFALO: Dude.


BIRD: Yes, dude?


BUFFALO: Stop And Smell The Roses, Ringo Starr, 1981.

BIRD: Dammit. Pipped again.

BUFFALO: I'm on fire, dude. Hey, gotta run. Desiree's at the door. She wants to see Bambi then Dumbo, but not necessarily in dat order. Laters.

BIRD: Double bill at eleven?

BUFFALO: Arf, arf!

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